Home » Creative writing » Pale Green, Chapter 5

Pale Green, Chapter 5

Photo by Magpie's Fancy via Flickr

Evan’s apartment glowed with afternoon sun. He savored that light on Jess’s skin, reflecting in her hair.

She grinned, opening a sleepy eye. Snuggling into the pillow, she enjoyed the sound the linens made as she moved.

“So,” said Evan, “you going home to his yellow kitchen?”

She was quiet.

His face fell. “Then, are you sure it should be that colour? Maybe I should paint it green.”

“Evan … I don’t make much. He’s hidden money. I can only make small withdrawals from the joint account without him noticing. I want to leave. Soon. But I’m trying to get a little cushion in my own account first.”

“We’d be fine, take care of each other.”

She touched his shoulder. “I think I believe you.”

“Why wouldn’t you?”

“I loved him …”

“I’m not him. I want to be with you, not limit you.”

She nestled closer beside him.

He stretched out, basking, then wondered what other colours she liked.

The End

***********

This is the last “chapter” I attempted for week #19 of Julia’s 100 Word Challenge. She kindly gave me permission to go ahead and link this. You can mosey on over there and read everyone’s entries by clicking here.

Many thanks to all who encouraged me in this. 

Advertisements

40 thoughts on “Pale Green, Chapter 5

    • I knew that not everyone in her situation would make the same choices as Jess. For some, the mere memory of love would be enough of a boundary to anything new. For others, the legalities — the bits of paper — constitute a boundary.

      For someone like Jess, who’s been living under a crushing weight, those boundaries probably feel like an extension of the pain she’s been through. That may be why some people just get angry and stay that way for a long time.

      Thanks for reading this story, Jennifer. I’m glad you enjoyed it.

  1. I definitely think she should find a way to leave her husband (even if it takes her a while to plan it properly). The husband is a bully and emotionally abusive. However, running into the arms of the painter who she’s only just met and knows very little about, might be ok for a fling but she shouldn’t move in with him on the strength of a little emotional support. This woman need to establish her independence and the self-esteem that comes with it before she makes any more romantic decisions.

    • And many after! Don’t worry, you didn’t spoil the romance for me. I think finding the best roads and keeping one’s head are an important part of romance. They’re the part that help keep it going.

  2. Great story, every chapter and as a whole. I just thought of one (dark) direction you could go if you were to keep it going–Evan wondering if she would like to see red spilling from her husband. Perhaps that’s what you meant? Perhaps we’ll never know?….

    • Wow, that’s definitely not what I meant! But I do see how popular fiction (and real life) have left us many examples that make it seem like this could go in that direction. I see Evan and Jess as nice people, and her husband as unfortunately dense about communicating with anyone.

      Thanks for reading my little experiment, TTD. I’m glad you enjoyed it.

  3. Love it! It did end happily-ish! There is so much more you could put in as well especially if you were not restricted by that phrase. Who restricts you like that? I’ll have to have a word.;) Well done for a great series of pieces. A lovely novella Re!

    • Thank you so much, Julia! And thanks for the props on using that phrase in each installment. I still can’t believe I figured out a way to include it five times that wasn’t too embarrassing. This definitely was quite a challenge! Thank you.

  4. OK, caught up and left my comments to the end. Great short story, and because you stuck to the limiting format, so tight. Last line is a an exquisite tease. Time to knuckle down and get that short story anthology started for real. Can I have a signed copy, please?

    • You’re very sweet, Al. Many thanks for the kind words. I’m trying hard to keep writing, keep producing, even when I’m tired, sleepy and feeling down. If I get as far I want (as far as you and others have encouraged me to go) I hope you know I’ll autograph anything you like. Thanks for being one of the ones who keep me trying.

    • Ooh yes, a collection would be great. This was so much fun (perhaps because I’m catching up with it in retrospect, so I don’t have to be waiting like everyone else 😉 )… I’ve love to see more serials like this!

  5. I read this all in one go – found the
    peices a little short. Time consuming
    to go back and click on others. A
    shorter piece is fine if that’s all there
    is, but there were five pieces here –
    and you spaced them widely – this
    has nothing to do with your writing
    ability just with the way you posted.
    but, perhaps, I am a speed reader.

    I got the impression of woman leaveing
    her old boyfriend/husband, for a painter.
    if your curious about clairity.

    I have several shorter stories posted
    and still welcome feedback on RUST
    My latest ghost story is called the
    Burlap cat, and I’ve posted some
    poems on dragons.

I love it when you talk to me ...

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s